Life's unexpected curve balls!

After 6 years away the army finally answered our knee begging pleas! We got to moved back to Colorado in December of 2010. Will was finally able to request Fort Carson as his duty station and we got to move home to be near family just in time for the holidays and to welcome our new baby boy. We had a house before we even left Washington, the army packed and moved us and It was prob the easiest most stress free time we have ever had with the army- and those times are almost non-existent!

               Back tracking to February of 2010- Will was deployed to Afghanistan and 11 days before coming home for R&R he was involved in an Ied explosion. His stryker was hit causing an explosion in the front of the vehicle and started a massive fire. Wills driver was severely injured, but alive! Will sustained a head injury ( blacking out), smoke inhalation ,and some bumps and bruises! He was treated by medics- given some pain meds and monitored .

Wills Vehicle

      July of 2010 Will came home to Washington and started the re-deployment process. After numerous ct scans and Dr's appts Will was diagnosed with a Traumatic brain injury and of course ptsd. He was put on meds(none of which helped) for the constant headaches he had and saw the Dr every so often, but nothing more. January of 2011 Will started in- processing to Fort Carson, Colorado. During the medical evaluation the commander started questioning his TBI , recent treatments (or lack there of) for it and what his previous unit had done concerning it( also lack there of!). He then decided to send Will to the medical board.

               For those who don't know, facing the medical board means you are evaluated by numerous Dr's, paperwork after paper work and eventually all the paperwork is sent to Fort Lewis, Washington ( funny enough where we were) The medical board Dr's at Ft Lewis then decide if you are Fit or Unfit to stay in the army. If they see you fit , you are then re-assigned- or allowed to re-class to a different non-deployable job( in most cases) If you are unfit you are either medically discharged or medically retired. Now mind you this is usually a very long process and even longer depending on the severity of the soldiers injuries.

       The last year of our lives has been anything but easy. The army of course has failed to help in so many ways ,specially with counseling. As a family we have been through the most trying time of our life, but I spare you the numerous details. So that brings us to today, the army's decision is finally in. I'm a wreck, I want anything but Will to be retired, as does he. We have our fingers eyes, toes you name is crossed in hopes that the army has found him fit to stay in and re-class. After 6 years of the military life it is safe to say we are comfortable. Knowing we have health care, the housing option, a guaranteed paycheck etc. But with 2 kids the thought of not having any of it is scary as hell. I'm not religious and my beliefs are mixed but if there is someone who answers prayers my prayer today would be this one thing. I know things happen for a reason and I hope the reason is to give Will a chance at the medical career he wants in the army. Wills meeting is at 2:30 today so off to run errands I go so I can keep my mind busy. I know my problems are so small compared to many but if you could please think a good thought for us! :)

Octoberfeis

     First of all we would like to Thank everyone who has made an honest effort to attend Keelies Feis's (You know who you are).And also to everyone out of state(and a few at home!) supporting her!! We definitely know how busy life is and understand that people can't attend them all! It has started to mean a lot to Keelie as well as Will and I. And of course our new extended Irish Dance family that we always get to share them with! Keelie is at the age that she has learned what promises are, and has also learned what it means to have a promise not followed through or simply to not have the effort made at all. As her parents Will and I have become very cut throat on protecting her from disappointment that isn't necessary that she face.




   The 2nd Irish Dancing Feis Keelie competed in was the Martin Percival School of Irish dance Octoberfeis in greenwood village. She competed in the First Feis under 7 age group and danced the Light Jig and Reel. She did a great job, placing 2nd in the Light Jig and 3rd in the Reel. She has a lot of practicing to do when it comes to not watching the dancers next to her! Every school has different steps to each dance, so watching someone not from our school blows your whole concentration and at Keelies age confuses the heck out her!


     Some of the  Feisannas do a special dance. The octoberfeis one was a Silly Sock dance. Keelie, her grandma and I made some little Halloween Irish dancers and attached them to fun Halloween socks with stickers. There were about 23 competitors ages 9 and under. Keelie was one of the last to dance. The moment Keelie started to dance the whole Ballroom erupted in cheers and whistles, naturally feeding from this Keelie took off dancing and owned that stage. There's no way to explain the whole scene in words but it was one of those emotionally charged makes this mom tear up kind of moments! Keelie was so into the moment not only did she drop the dance she was supposed to be doing and do her own she also had to be asked to stop dancing when her time was up! The dance was judged wrong and places were given to very good dancers( champions ect) that Keelie had no chance in beating, but she had a blast anyways and we won't ever forget the crowds reaction!

     Keelie won her first trophy and another medal to add to her prized awards shelf and we have a very long break until the next feis due to her surgery, so lots and lots of time to practice!!

Festivals, Dancing, and Heritage!

   This past weekend was an absolute blast! Will and I decided to sign Keelie up for her first Irish Feis, and crazily chose the Longs Peak Scottish/Irish Feis to do so! The kids, their Godmother Danielle and I drove up to Estes Park Saturday afternoon and met up with my parents. We had a fun evening at the YMCA of the Rockies lodging. Keelie went swimming with grandpa and some friends from dance and after a very wide awake Deklan finally fell asleep I managed to get a couple hours of sleep! O-dark thirty comes fast!!

     The process of putting Keelie's hair up and her wig on can be rather lengthy but I managed to get it done, go eat some breakfast and make it to the fair grounds in record time- an accomplishment for our family!! The Feis started at 9 with figure danced slotted first. Keelie was registered to dance the 2 hand reel- which is a 2 person reel dance. The solo reel and solo light jig. We got Keelie dressed, she ran thru a couple practice dances with her partner and then headed backstage. I thank god for Danielle, cause without her I would have been one lost confused mess!

      There were 2 stages one large and one smaller stage. Inside the large tent were 3 different stages all in a row. Each stage hosts the same dance but different age group. Dancing got underway, it seemed to end as fast as it started!! They get going and don't stop rolling- i made a rhyme, retarded I know! Anyways.... Keelie danced the 2 hand- and she did a really good job! I was so nervous I wanted to cry- sad I know, but I guess someone had to be nervous and Keelie sure wasn't! Very short break in-between, quick run thru of the next dance and back on stage. Keelie was a bit confused and grab the girl closest to her on stage- still thinking she was dancing the 2 hand and refusing to let go. Another dancer from the school finally told her she had to dance by herself and she let go! All week prior to the feis we had practiced with Keelie, she new not to wave to anyone and if she forgot the steps to just keep dancing! And keep dancing she did! Each school has different steps to each dance- so it can be very confusing. You try your hardest not to watch the dancer next to you and remember your own steps- of course for Keelie that was a little hard! It was so crazy in the tent with a million dancers and people watching. Keelie started her reel, in what seemed to be the right steps and from there on out I have no clue as to what dance she was doing! But hey she kept on dancing! Her third and final dance went about the same- her little butt danced all over the stage- she was even told by one of the helpers twice that her dance was over and she needed to stop- she gave him a not so happy look and walked to the back of the stage. 

     

       We did this feis to get the experience, and did not expect Keelie to place in anything, but to her happy surprise she got a 4th place in the 2 hand reel! We are so very PROUD of her!! She wore her medal proudly for majority of the day- showing it to everyone! Keelie loves the stage- she begged to go back on and dance - so to avoid temptation we went and walked the festival. After enjoying a few things with some family friends, we ate some yummy food and will and my mom spent some time looking into our family heritage. Will was able to find his family line- the Clan Macraes and my mom found the Clan Ross. After doing a bunch of research today we added the Clan O'Briens and the Clan Campbell's to our lineage line! Will is beyond excited to have discovered all his family colors and crests and is already planning our festival trip next year! I will enjoying the fair with my 2 men dressed proudly in their kilts( oh yes will is beyond stoked for his kilt and will be putting Deklan in one as well) and my daughter who will be dressed in her Shirley temple wig-- I can't wait!!

FEIS FUN!!!!!

For all our Family and friends here is a tentative schedule for all of the upcoming feiseannas .Keelie will be competing in!! Tentative- meaning after we see how she does at the first one this weekend!!

Keelie will pretty much always dance on the Sunday of the feis( for now)

and will usually be one of the first dances of the day! It will be awesome to see anyone who comes to watch and support Keelie. A few *rules* to be noted(not my rules-ones we were warned of!) Pictures are not really allowed during the competition( so sneak them!) DO NOT go anywhere near the stage or adjudicators table. Please be very quiet, no clapping or anything during the dancing, and for Keelies sake of staying focused don't wave at her- she has been practicing all week not to wave at anyone from the stage( she loves to wave) :)

Longs Peak Feis 2011
Scottish-Irish Highland Festival
Estes Park, CO - Sep 10, 2011 to Sep 11, 2011
Website-http://www.scotfest.com/Scottish_Festival/Home.html
*This Feis you have to buy tickets for- $20 online to get in the festival gate


Oktoberfeis
Friday Sept 30, Sat Oct1, Sun Oct 2                                          
Double Tree Denver Tech Center
7801 East Orchard Road
Greenwood Village, Colorado
Website--http://www.octoberceilimor.com/index.htm


Celtic Steps School Feis (Will have more info soon)
October 29
Denver, CO


Colorado Fall Feis 2011 (Will have more info for this one as well)
Loveland, CO - Nov 6, 2011

Who reads this anyways??

             Lately life has had me by the horns. It has been full of disappointment, rejection, and hurt. Despite the fact that this should be such a happy time, moving home to Colorado, a new beautiful baby boy and of course Keelie being a simple blessing in my life, it hasn't been. I finally came to the conclusion that I was allowing the actions of other people, be it friends or family and even strangers to affect how I was feeling. Yes I know this shouldn't be, but ha ha easier said then done. I created this blog in hopes that family and even friends would join, read what our family is up to and maybe even comment on our everyday happenings. Why you ask, because this is important to me, it is nice to know people may actually care.Virtues I'm trying so very hard to instill in my children, the pride of family, selflessness , and simple caring for each other. As unimportant as a simple blog may seem a little effort goes a long way. But it seems now days everyone is so wrapped around themselves its to much to ask for that little bit of effort. I'm not sugar coating here, and frankly am not worried about hurting any ones feelings. In the past not many people have seemed to care about hurting mine.

               My daughter has grown immensely in the past few years. Everyday she is exploring new adventures both good and bad. My son has grown so fast I'm afraid to blink, he is a whole new world compared to his sister. Somethings I'd love to share with anyone willing to listen. Over the past few years that list of people caring has grown smaller and smaller.

Everyone has an excuse. The miles between us, dislike of your family , how so busy you are ect. ect. Funny though, I've closed those miles between me and some people, yet there's even less communication now then when I was farther away. I'm busy as hell, I finally know whats its like to not have enough hours in a day, but I still find time to talk to the people who want to talk to me.Yes I could do more, but I at least try some. I'm told a lot that I can always call or stop by, well ya know it goes both ways. I can count on 1 hand the amount of times some have seen my son. I'm finding I can't say its everyone- just certain people - me being one of them,  that isn't so important to the rest.  I walk on egg shells, or pretend to be someone else so I can be liked more, only to seem as if I'm not liked at all.Or only called when they need something.


               I'm sitting here tonight, in another "self pity" mood. Hoping to god my hormones will go back to normal soon and I will stop feeling this way. Its amazing and yet sad at the same time that I find myself in these moods lately following my bio class. A class of 24 "adults" who in one way or another can act so beyond childish,catty, and just plain mean. I thought high school was where all this crap happened, not the real world. Yet I seem to re-enter high school every time I go. I hated high school- nothing about high school was a positive for me. I wasn't "cool" or a "nerd" or really part of any group. Maybe " loser" is the term they used in high school. I had a lot of friends- well at least I thought, but I'm lucky if even a couple of them speak to me now-a-days. Now don't get me wrong I know everyone grows up , some move away, have busy lives of their own, but I always like to think I make friends for life. Instead the friends I've made for life are the ones the army's many moves have blessed me with, one of whom has become one of the greatest friends or as I like to call her framily, a girl could ask for. There are a few people I talk to now and then but none of them "close" friends.

Now if you ask anyone who really knows me, I would drop anything to help my friends and family. I would give every penny I had or even the shirt off my back- ok well maybe not the shirt off my back cause that just wouldn't be a pretty sight!But I'm there if someone needs me.I worry about every word that comes out of my mouth, for fear of hurting someones feelings or saying the wrong thing. I tried very hard in to get everyone to like me, yes I know not everyone will like you, but I can sure try can't I. Instead I end up the opposite. The last one picked for the team, if I'm even picked at all. I'm not invited to celebrate peoples birthdays, or to friends weddings or baby showers. If I am its because I'm the one throwing the event. If I'm lucky enough to attend an event, I meet a ton of people, 9 times out of 10 the person next to me ends up with 10 new friends and I haven't a single one. I've questioned my looks, my personality everything I can think of, people always tell me that doesn't matter, but seriously lets compare..........

one of my lab partners shes tall, skinny, sorta pretty----- me I'm short, fat and I'll stop there( I'm not nice to myself) anyways 3 guys in our group- 3 months together and tonight I find out they don't even know my name, however the other girl- of course they know her name, they question every time shes gone, call her beautiful girl, yada yada - hopefully you get the picture.When do I get to be part of the "freakin cool" people? What in gods name determines "cool"? Are my looks not good enough to fit in the important club? Who is it that decides these things and why can't I have a god damn ticket to the club? Why am I not important enough to get an invite, or see when you come to town, make plans with, what makes you so much cooler then me?- god I could go on, but get no-where. I find little comfort in knowing I'm not the only person who goes thru this because I feel as if no one should.

Everyone tells me I'm wonderful, i have beautiful children ect ect. My children are beautiful and I hope I can instill in them what I cant seem to find for myself. But at the same time my children are not "me" , please don;t take that the wrong way, my kids are my whole life but I don't want people to like me because my children are amazing and beautiful. I'd like for people to like me for me, and not say they do then talk behind my back-

I have always thought the actions of men the best interpreters of their thoughts. ~John Locke

To be honest I don't want to be "cool". My children think I'm the coolest person in the world and to me that is enough. What I want is to be taken for who I'am. To be acknowledged, invited, considered important. For people to give a damn, about every aspect of me and my life and to show they give a damn. Not once in a blue moon when it's convenient..

Someone I love dearly, who has taught me so much, yet also made me question a lot of things about life will be leaving my life sooner then later. It hit me hard when I learned that she knew all too well the not so nice( and I'm being nice) things going on with the people surrounding her. She has done so much for a lot of people through her life and I for one will be the first to be there for her. The reality of life has been shoved in my face, yes we are all born and then we all die. But what does it all mean, what is truly the meaning and purpose of life. I'm not religious and not even going there, but these thoughts just push even more my feelings towards friends, and family. I will instill in my children just how important this all is and as for everyone else the ball is now in their court................

My Montage 5/18/11 at OneTrueMedia.com

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

His GRAND entrance!

Deklan Kace- a Celtic/Irish name meaning goodness, prosperous and a famous saint. And saint this little man thinks he is!!
   
     I was originally scheduled for an induction on March 18th(37 weeks), pending the results of an amniocentesis to test his lungs for maturity. When the results came back transitional- meaning borderline- the Dr's decided against induction and re-scheduled us for the following week on March 25th. I spent all weekend with lots of labor pains and even ventured to Labor and Delivery only to have my labor just kinda stop .I had been sitting at 3-4 cm and 60 percent effaced for a couple weeks but never went any farther . So we would go back home and spend the rest of the time trying to dance, bowl and walk/lunge this kid out!  BUT.........NO!

    He stayed nice and put in his hot tub!  The weight scan and amniotic fluid check they had also done on the 16th showed that Deklan weighed over 9lbs and I had 32 centimeters of fluid( a hell of A LOT!!) So I was becoming a bit anxious to get him out!

   I woke up around 4am( well never really went to bed) on the morning of the 25th. I couldn't call L & D until around 6:30 to find out what time to come, so I spent the time doing my hair, nails, shaved  and yada yada- yes all this just to go have a baby! Of course when I finally got to call I was told to call back at 8 after shift change, damn more waiting. Thank god I was ready cause at 8 they said come right in, of course I forgot to wake the husband and now had to wait for him to get ready- patients all gone now!

   Got to the hospital and waited some freakin more! Head nurse finally came in and informed me that they were packed full and out of rooms ( I thankfully was already in a room) They were waiting for the boss to decided if I was going to have to come back in a few hours or be allowed to stay. In my head I thought let them try and remove me from this bed- I'm having this damn baby! But I was nice and "patient" and I waited. For once in my life it paid off, the nurse came back said I could stay and started my iv- of course 5 very painful sticks and some Novocain later I was ready to stab her with the needle! Pitocin was finally started at 11:30 am and slowly increased over the next few hours. Bored out of ours minds my mom, husband and friend Mary started a Harry Potter Marathon! Bets were we wouldn't make it through the first one- aahahahahahaha wrong..!  I was def having contractions, I could feel them but nothing to really speak of. At one point they even backed off the pitocin because I had become tackycicalic(my spelling is way wrong): contractions right on top of each other. Dr checked me at 5pm I was only 5cm and about 80 percent effaced. We discussed a procedure called needling my water- because of my polyhydraminos( eccess fluid) they couldn't break my water due to risk of cord prolapse ( the cord coming before the baby) They take a small hollow needle and poke a couple holes to slowly release the fluid, which also allows them to help guide the baby's head down first. Dr increased the pitocin again and left.

     Dr came back 30 mins later and needled my water. Now that my friends is a very interesting feeling- I will spare you the details! So the flood started...Slowly of course however the moment my water started to leak my pain level shot through the roof. I had to get up- sit on a ball walk do anything, the pain was in my back and legs - finally the pain I remember from Keelies delivery- time to get the show on the road! However as soon as I sat up my water broke completely- now that was a damn flood- but no worries I had my sham wow! 
     The Dr decided to go ahead and put an internal monitor on monkey since we had done nothing but fight with the regular monitors to keep tabs on my contractions and the baby. I finally made it out of bed and onto the exercise ball- those things feel so nice to sit on during labor. I was so proud- I was doing ok managing the pain, at least I thought so.A few mins later I asked for Iv drugs and was of course ordered back to bed .. In the words of the labor nurse " These are mind altering drugs you must be off your feet" And mind altering they sure were- damn was I high! Of course let me tell you, don't waste your time with iv drugs cause they do nothing for the pain. My husband took the tiny 5 mins the drugs worked to take pictures of my non functioning stoned self!( I have shared these pictures with no-one.. until now)

   Sometime around 6:45pm I couldn't handle it anymore. I demanded an epidural, my husband of course fought with me " Now Cari do I need to call Christina and have her remind you that you don't want them?"
Me: Begging and pleading- there is no way I can go on with this pain. The nurse got the anesthesiologist and the Dr checked me- of course no further change. No sooner then the Dr had left the room I felt my body start to push. Knowing I was still only 5cm I tried everything I could to hold it!!!! Ya like that could happen- The next 4 mins happened so fast I only remember from what I was told............I started yelling I was pushing and couldn't stop, my mom ran to find the Dr ( of course no need the whole damn floor could hear me yelling) Will was at my side telling me I was getting what I wanted...NO PAIN MEDS! Now when your in so much pain that's the last damn thing you want to hear- so no dear husband at that moment it was not what I wanted- in fact I almost felt my heart drop!.......................back to the chaos.... 2 seconds later I had my labor nurse on one side and  a lady on the other introducing herself as Sharon, the baby nurse.

My thought- Baby nurse, why the hell do I need a baby nurse ? This baby isn't coming right now!!

2 pushes and a soaked Dr, Nurse and Husband later  Deklan Kace was born. ALL NAT-UR- EL!

I had gone from 5cm to fully dilated & effaced and delivered a baby all in 4 mins. When the Dr had arrived back in the room, baby's head was already coming out, apparently he wasn't going to wait on anyone! And due to my poly all the excess fluid that was behind the baby was literally sprayed out like a water hose( you know you wanted to hear that!!), hence fourth why anyone standing within 5 feet became very wet! Now remember how monkey was supposed to weigh over 9 lbs?.... The grand total weight- 7lbs 5oz, talk about way off! In fact I lost 21 lbs the moment I delivered- that should give you an idea of how much fluid I had.

Ahh it was all over and I was finally getting to meet my little man. The poor baby was very bruised due to the rapid birth- he came out face up so his nose and forehead where a bit banged up! And the very chubby baby I was expecting was instead a rather tiny, skinny wrinkled looking old man!! But he was my little old man and I loved him more then life itself. Recovery was a lot easier and faster then when I'd had an epidural with Keelie and I was finally able to breastfeed and succeed! We are now enjoying every moment with both of our children, Deklan has already proven in the last few weeks that the 2nd child grows up  faster then the first! Two children is def an adventure , but one I'm loving every bit of!!


PLEASE WATCH THE SLIDE SHOW!!


 

Children and cell phones

I understand in this day and age that parents are provider their children with cell phones at very young ages. Which is fine by me, that's a parents choice, be it to keep tabs on their children or whatever. However if you are going to chose to allow your child any age ( teens included) please by all means teach them proper phone etiquette. In the past week I have received 2 texts messages from children who've had the wrong number. Here is one of the so very irritating conversations.

Random number text-" Heyyy its Aunecitta!!!"

Me:" I'm sorry who is this"

Child:" pa  Nene"

Me:" Sorry are you speaking english? And I'm sorry but I do not know you".

Child:" Really? Cause the girl you gave your number to is english."   ( my head: uh what?)

Me:" I'm sorry but I have not given my number out to anyone and you must have the wrong number"

Child:" Shut up" (My head: wow really!)

Me:" Excuse me , I do not know who you are, I did not give out my number so you have the wrong number, please stop texting my phone."

Child: 5 mins later      " FINE"

Child: 5 more mins later  " WHATEVER"

Child: yet again 5 mins later " SERIOUSLY"

Child: "If you are not going to answer me I will do this project by myself." ( my head: please by all means do and leave me the hell alone)

I had finally had enough and called this young lady. I politely told her yet again you have the wrong number please stop being childish and stop messaging my phone.

Child: 5 mins later " I'm sorry obviously I have the wrong number"
Child: 2 mins later " I said I was sorry"   ( My Head- ok seriously this little girl is pushing my nerves)

Me: Please stop texting or  I will notify the cell phone company as well as your parents that your abusing the use of a phone and also ask that you pay my cell bill since you are using up my messages.

SHE FINALLY STOPPED!

The other text I received from a teenage boy, asking for sexual favors, yes sexual favors( a bit too unappropriated to put on here!) He became so ridiculous my husband called him as well as notifying our phone company.

   Now this is ridiculous and beyond annoying. My child will never own a cell phone until 1: she can pay for it and 2: she can use it properly. So please parents if your going to allow your children to have them freakin teach them some responsibility and manners with using them.

Ballet Class turned Boxing match.

Picture this- classical music, 10 little girls in pink leotards ,skirts,tights and ballet shoes practicing for their upcoming recital. You think how cute and innocent..... not with my daughter in the class!

             The bar at the back of the studio is loaded with costumes for the recital. All the students were told not to touch the costumes. Now when Keelie is told something and someone else is not doing what they were told she takes it upon herself to correct them.

          The girls were lined up by the bar awaiting instruction when the little girl next to Keelie started playing with the costumes. *Now I was not in the class I only watched through the window and was later given more details from the teacher. * Keelie most likely told the girl not to touch the costumes- starting an argument which lead to the little girl pushing Keelie. Now I know your thinking typical girl fight- but that apparently  is "not" how my daughter fights. Keelie balled her fist and punched the little girl square in the face. Screams and cries started immediately and knowing what she had done was wrong Keelie's tears started to flow too. Mortified at how many people had seen my daughter do this and also for the little girls parents( luckily her mom did not see), I was lost for words to even say to her.Her crying gave me a moment to quickly find words and I quietly spoke to her - knowing of course that all parents eyes were on me.
  

          When all was said and done Keelie apologized to the little girl and gave her a hug. Keelies right hook however wasn't so very forgiving and the little girl who was still very upset ended up going home.My first thought was where the heck did that come from- and where did my child learn to punch like that? Now I don't condone what Keelie did, but I am glad she in some way stood up for herself after the little girl pushed her- but I did explain we stand up for ourselves in other ways not by hitting.Will is usually the one who takes keelie to ballet and to be honest I'm so thankful I don't have to go back next week

Our Dancing queen!

She is our 3 year old dancing queen, and will steal the show and your hearts the first chance she gets!!

       Keelie has kept us beyond busy with her love for dance. In Washington she started ballet at Mrs Brianna's dance studio(Studio moves dance center), where she danced for almost a year. She did her first recital and was center of the stage! Her wardrobe quickly changed to pink, skirts( or ballerina tutus as keelie called them) and more pink! And the decorations on her bedroom walls also became all about ballet!

       After our move to Colorado and a sad goodbye from Studio Moves.Keelie joined The Colorado Springs Ballet Society where she is currently taking ballet and tap. She very much misses Miss Brianna, and has become a bit bored with her new teacher and ballet. She is however very much enjoying the tap part of it. She will be staring in a production of Little Red Riding Hood this June and afterwards I think we will be taking the next session off to continue with Keelie's new dance love, Irish dancing!!

      Keelie's godmother has been Irish dancing since she was about 9 and watching her dance many times inspired us to let Keelie try it out. Being the youngest dancer Celtic Steps Irish dance studio has ever had, we weren't really sure how Keelie would do. She attended her first class in Feb, despite how hard Irish dancing is Keelie seemed to catch onto the concept pretty quickly. She learned a baby jig, the 8 count for Irish dance, a side jig and a few other steps I can't remember! Come March Keelie attended St Patricks day practices with the Woodland Park dance team( also the team her godmother dances on). Saint Patricks day naturally being one of the biggest times of year for Irish dance schools!

March 12th started the weeks festivities with the St Patricks day parade, Keelie rode on the float in the parade and loved every min of it.

On the 13th she danced at Jack Quinn's Irish pub for family night. A very enjoyable evening of Irish food, beer, music and lots of dancing!

On the 16th Keelie danced at the elementary schools and senior center in woodland park and to finish off the week a huge recital " An Enchanted Evening with Celtic Steps" performed at Palmer High school.

A savings account specifically for dance looks like a must for the future! I know how much money we have already invested and she is only 3! In June Keelie is excited to do her first Feis, the Pikes Peak Feis located in monument, Colorado and after that who knows what her dance future holds! We do know though that she absolutely loves it and we enjoy every minute spent watching her do it! We hope in the future everyone will get a chance to watch her as well!

Infection ...Again ;(

After years of Chronic double ear infections, speech delay and finally having tubes put in Keelie has been sick and infection free for almost a year now. She is also finally doing speech therapy and talking so much better. However...... right before we left Washington her ENT dr told us that her left tube looked liked it was getting ready to fall out( which happens about 6months to a year after they are put in). She advised that we follow up with Ent in Colorado as soon as possible to keep an eye on the tube and also to make sure we don't retract back to previous issues, like hearing and speech problems, fluid in her ears and infections.

   About 3 weeks ago we saw Keelie's new primary care dr who put in the refferal for Ent and also Audiology. She also stated that Keelies ear was so compacted with wax deep in her ear that she couldn't even see the tube and she wanted Ent to clean it and look at it. If you know anything about tricare, they take their sweet ass time to do anything and of course took almost 2 weeks to put through the refferal. However they didn't put it through right and here we are still stuck without seeing a dr.

    2 nights ago Keelies ear started draining very thick very yucky fluid and she started to complain that it hurt. I called her dr's nurse the following morning about the ent refferal and explained to her what was going on. She had us come in right away so they could look at Keelies ear. Low and behold the poor child has a severe ear infection that has punctured a whole through her tympanic membrane. The membrane is so swollen that the dr is unable to see if the tube is even in her ear still.That would explain her lack of balance, crabbiness and lack of listening skills recently! With a fancy little lighted tool the Dr was able to clean some of the deep packed puss,blood, fluid and wax out of her ear and then gave her a heavy antibiotic and ear drops. We were once again referred to Ent, yet still waiting for tricare to get off their asses.

    The tubes had cleared everything up as far as ear infections and Keelie has been even cold free for the last year, but now we have started all over and I'm really hoping once this clears up we are not on the track back to more ear infections and another set of tubes.................................

Our adventures with monkey!!

At 14 weeks of pregnancy I went in for a routine Drs appt. During the exam the dr discovered I was 2cm dilated and my cervix was quite irritated. He immediately did an ultrasound to check that baby was alive and well and then sent me up to Labor and Delivery to be checked by high risk doctors. After weeks of exams and ultrasounds the doctors determined my cervix was still a good length, baby looked healthy and the possible cerclage that was afraid to be needed would not be needed after all.I was informed however of my risk of pre-term labor due to my previous pre-term with keelie, and was reccomended that I go on Progesterone 17, a drug study that was said to help prevent pre-term. I was then discharged from high risk ob and could continue to see my regular OB.

At 22 weeks we received another ultrasound , and they discovered that Mr monkey was a bit on the large side and ordered a blood glucose test to check for gestational diabetes. Results came back normal and we just assumed he was going to be a big boy!!

We moved to Colorado around Christmas and started seeing new doctors at premier health clinic. At 27/28 weeks I went yet again for a routine appt. Upon examination the dr said my uterus was 4 1/2 weeks too large and that I was 50 percent efaced and about 2-3 cm dialated. We had an emergency ultrasound and were then sent to the hospital for monitoring. After 3 hours of monitoring my contractions and a dose of Indocin to stop labor, the doctor informed us that I had what was called Polyhydramnios or excess amniotic fluid. His main concern was that the cause of the excess fluid was a physical abnormality with the baby and we would be sent to Memorial Hospitals Maternal Fetal Medicine clinic for a level 2 target ultrasound.I was also given a Fetal Fibronectin test to determine pre-term labor, which came back negative but only determined for up to 2 weeks. So for now we were to go home on bedrest orders and of course to come back if labor started again.

29/30 weeks we went to Memorial MFM clinic for the ultrasound. During the ultrasound they determined that Mr Monkey, who we now call gigantor!! Is 4 lbs of huge( babies at 29 weeks average 2 to 2 1/2 lbs) I also have an AFI(amniotic fluid index) of 30centimeters. Anything 24 or higher is considered high. On top of that upon examination and measurement of monkeys head they discovered his head was very large and that he has enlarged ventricles. Which indicates a blockage and fluid on his brain. With all the excess fluid the doctors were unable to get exact readings in the size and will have to go back in a few weeks to try again and to then diagnose or determine what to do next. Back tracking to the excess fluid we now had to determine why there was excess and then what to do about it . Most excess fluid and large babies are cause by gestational diabetes. Other causes are unknown reasons, rh factor, twin to twin ,and abnormalities with the baby( cleft palate, intestinal blockage, something with the kidneys ect.)by the end of the ultrasound we had determined that monkey didn't have any
visible physical abnormalities that would cause the excess fluid( there still is a possibility of one they aren't able to see) so the next step is test again for diabetes. Despite diabetes not being a healthy option it would have been the easiest option. With reg diet and meds the fluid could be controlled and the baby's weight gain watched. Are you confused or lost yet?? Ha ha!!

Recap- so we now know the baby has a possible chromosomal abnormality in his brain( hopefully treatable) and he's very large with lots of amniotic fluid! All of which add even more to my high risk of pre-term labor . There are numerous risks and problems with all of the issues we have encountered they are all just so undetermined as to what risks or issues we may encounter right now.

Today(wed) I got the results of my tests back and I'm gestational diabetes free. So now back to square one of finding out what's going on and still lots of unknown! I'm not a person who worries or over reacts in situations like this but I have come to the aggravation of just wanting a normal planned pregnancy. If you know the pregnancy and labor we went through with Keelie you would understand more my want to succeed at my set plan!! However my children are determined to teach me how to go with the flow of the unknown and unexpected and that no matter how much I would like things to go my way and be in my control they aren't! Starting next week I will be doing antepartum testing twice a week with once a week ultrasounds and hopefully within the next few weeks between all the Drs visit we will determine the next plan of action. At this point the only determined fact is that Mr monkey will be common earlier then his due date whether by his own accord or the Doctors!!

I'm sure I have missed a lot of details or information but my head is swimming with 5 million things so please don't kick me for any confusion!!